Marriage is one of the most important duties; this precept restores the original unity of Adam who represented the masculine and feminine principles and provides for the continuity of the Jewish people through procreation.
1) When a couple decides to get married, they must present themselves to the Rabbinical Office which will provide all the necessary information in order to establish the wedding date and to lay the basis for the foundation of a Jewish home and family.
In this preparatory phase of the marriage, the future spouses will attend courses organized by the community which will inform them on the meaning of marriage, on Jewish matrimonial law, on kashrut, on the observance of the Sabbath and on celebrations, on teaching the Torah to their children, on the of the Taharat ha-mishpachà (marital relations), on the mitzvà of the tzedaqà (helping the needy).
These norms help to create that atmosphere of kedusha (holiness) which solidifies the Jewish family and assures it happiness and divine blessing.
At the time of marital publication, the spouses must declare that they intend to celebrate the wedding at the Great Synagogue in Rome or in another place and must deliver to the Civil Status Office of the Municipality, in addition to the certificates required by law (birth, citizenship, free status), a request from the Rabbinical Office, which can be collected from the same office.
Publications must not be made on the Sabbath or on a Jewish holiday.
2) Once the wedding date has been fixed, having obtained the authorization from the Civil Status Officer of the Municipality, the spouses will present themselves to the Administration of the Community and to the Rabbinical Office to deliver these documents and to provide their own Jewish names and those of their parents, necessary for the writing of the Ketubà (marriage contract).
3) The bride will make arrangements to take the Tevilà (ritual bath) in the Miqvè.
The Miqvè is a tank containing spring water or water that has come into contact with spring water or rainwater, built according to certain standards.
To comply with the rules, Tevilà must only be made in the miqvè (or, under certain conditions, in spring water, sea water, etc.). Tevilà can only be made when at least seven days have passed since the end of the menstrual period.
During the Tevilà, women must take care not to wear rings or hairpins, varnish on their nails, lipstick or anything else that prevents contact with water; during the dive the mouth must be closed but not tight.
The Tevilà must be carried out before the wedding.
According to the Torah, sexual life is a fundamental part of existence and is part of the project of creation. The purpose of sexual relations, alongside procreation, is also to create a harmonious life as a couple.
After seven days from the observation of the total absence of blood loss, women immerse themselves in the miqve.
Respecting these rules has, among other consequences, the fact that by abstaining for at least twelve days a month from having sexual relations, spouses are induced to set up their marriage on other forms of dialogue and communication.
After each Tevilà there is thus a renewal of relationships with a continuous rediscovery of one’s partner, which helps to prevent the relationship from drying up.
The Tevilà – except for the one that must be done before the wedding and which can be done during the day – must be done in the evening after the stars have come out.
Before immersion, women must be perfectly clean.
The text on the Tevilà rules can be requested from the Miqvé employee.
4) It is customary for the fathers of the bride and groom to go up to read the Torah on the Saturday preceding the wedding day.
5) Before reading the Ketuba, the groom will give the celebrating Rabbi the ring he intends to give to the bride, which he himself has purchased.
It is not Jewish to exchange rings.
Cohen are subject to some limitations in his choice of bride (for example: he cannot marry a divorcee or a proselyte).
Wedding are not celebrated on the following days:
- in solemn feasts and mid-feasts;
- in fasts;
- on the days from Rosh ha-Shana to Kippur;
- during part of the days of the Omer (from the beginning of Pesach up to and including the 18th of Yiar) and in those going from the 17th of Tammuz to the 9th of Av.